[Kindly unearthed from the Archives by Bram Peeters]
Main: "The USS Calhoun, which we are about to christen today,
is the first ship in the fleet with a working transwarpdrive, although it
still is experimental.
You have off course all heard about the USS Excelsior which also was
equipped with a experimental transwarpdrive. Unfortunately, Starfleet had
abandoned this project, when it turned out not to be reliable. Now, due to
the information we got from the USS Voyager Starfleet did start a new
transwarp project, resulting in this fine ship. Our first mission will be
to go to the Delta Quadrant and make new diplomatic relations."
-- ST Frontier Fleet, USS Calhoun, 2390.05.05
Sadek's Rat
[Also pulled out from the vaults by Bram Peeters]
Kylie: "Today I had a unfortunate confrontation with a big rat. It scared
the hell out of me. Have one of you already heard if someone caught the
beast?"
O'Ceallaigh: "Rrrraaatt? There shouldn't be any rodents aboard this ship? I
mean, we aren't planet bound...."
-- ST Frontier Fleet, USS Calhoun, 2390.06.19
Crewman: "I don't believe that was the rat who chewed ensign whatever's head
off. It looks really harmless."
Su: "It did WHAT ??"
Crewman: "Well, that's what people are saying. That it was some kind of
mutant rat kept in a cage in Sickbay until it escaped, and . . ."
-- ST Frontier Fleet, USS Calhoun, 2390.06.19
Logix: "Lt. Logix to all hands. Because there are a lot of misunderstandings
about the presence of a rat on the ship, I am forced to explain the
situation. To prevent disorder. A lot of different stories about this rodent
are spreading across the ship. None of them is true. What is true is that
there is a rat on the Calhoun. It is the pet of Ensign Sadek, our new AOPS.
But it is completely harmless. Ensign et'Dosa died this morning, but it was
NOT caused by the rat. I can assure you, there is nothing to fear about.
Logix out."
-- ST Frontier Fleet, USS Calhoun, 2390.06.19
Jim Janssens: "Commander Janssens to security. I have a rodent problem in my
office, can you send someone, or shall I beam it to the brig? It stole my
lunch..."
-- ST Frontier Fleet, USS Calhoun, 2390.06.19
Logix: "Mr. Harris, stand aside. This is a security matter; I will take care
that the rat gets the punishment it deserves."
Jim Janssens: "Excuse me Mr. Logix, but I don't think a rat inside a
forcefield will attack mr. Harris, because it's just a... rat."
-- ST Frontier Fleet, USS Calhoun, 2390.06.19
Officer 1: "Yeah, and I heard that it's already breeding somewhere in the
lower decks. Maybe it's being so close to engineering that mutated them."
Officer 2: "So long as they catch them. I don't know about you, but I'll be
sleeping with my phaser handy tonight."
Officer 1: "Can you imagine, something big enough to bite et'Dosa's head
clean off?"
Officer 2: "I don't want to think about it. Even the normal size ones are
bad enough."
Torlith: "What killed this Dosa person?"
Officer: "A giant rat! It's all over the ship. Everyone is talking about it.
I even hear the security department is huntin."
-- ST Frontier Fleet, USS Calhoun, 2390.06.19
Crewman Pete: "Well, he was found dead in a Jefferies tube at deck 10, and
his head was bitten off."
Bill Janssens: "His head bitten off? You are kidding, right?"
Pete: "No really, crewman Gray heard about it from a friend, who was doing
some maintenance work in the transporter room at the same time the body was
found, and ordered to be transported to sickbay."
-- ST Frontier Fleet, USS Calhoun, 2390.06.19
Bill: "But his head BITTEN off? By what?"
Pete: "Well, I don't know, but I once heard a story about some Sykorian
bats, which had been living inside the Jefferies tubes of the USS Vienna for
over 3 months, without being detected. They were discovered after they
started attacking the crew...The bats that live on Sylorius Prime are almost
as big as"
Bill: "Yeah right Pete... by the way, don't you have any work to do? And I
should thank you for telling me this story, I have to go to the starboard
nacelle in a couple of hours... by crawling through Jefferies tubes..."
-- ST Frontier Fleet, USS Calhoun, 2390.06.19
More Quotes
Nameless Tactical officer, to Harris: "Commander! The Klingons are firing on the Klingons!"
- - ST Frontier Fleet, USS Calhoun, 2390.11.28
Jordan Reid: "Seems me and John have been living together for a while. Strange when neither of us knew it before last night."
- - ST Frontier Fleet, USS Calhoun, 2390.11.28
O'Reilly: "Sickbay isn't a prison, you know."
-- ST Frontier Fleet, USS Calhoun, Stardate 2390.06.29
O'Reilly: "I don't need a second walking textbook wandering aimlessly around Sickbay. I don't even need one, for that matter."
-- ST Frontier Fleet, USS Calhoun, Stardate 2390.06.29
Maiek: "So long as I am to be treated as a professional and not a Romulan."
-- ST Frontier Fleet, USS Calhoun, Stardate 2390.06.29
Maiek: "Oh, this is much better than the brig. Lock me up for no reason. Then let me go with no explanation. Invite me back and then ignore me. Then they go and lock me up again."
-- ST Frontier Fleet, USS Calhoun, Stardate 2390.06.29
Bren: "Resistance is fruitile, you will be distilled?"
-- ST Frontier Fleet, USS Calhoun, Stardate 2390.06.30
Jameson: "Two of the lads wanted to present them dressed as Borg but I managed to convince them that Security might not appreciate the humour."
-- ST Frontier Fleet, USS Calhoun, Stardate 2390.06.30
Jameson: "Mam chose Aphrodite. She said I was the first girl of the family and ought to have a pretty name. Da chose Wren. Used to be a wren's nest up in the eaves of the house. So I ended up as Aphrodite Wren."
Bren: "I guess you must be grateful you didn't have bats instead then."
-- ST Frontier Flett, USS Calhoun, Stardate 2390.06.30
Jameson: "It's not like I'm gonna try running self regenerating coolant mutagens in your bloodstream."
-- ST Frontier Fleet, USS Calhoun, Stardate 2390.06.30
Jameson: "I'd rather not be the one responsible for the captain electrocuting himself and blowing all the breaker fuses... the chief would be harsh on me for that."
-- ST Frontier Fleet, USS Calhoun, Stardate 2390.06.30
More Quotes #2
Harris: "Reminds you of a hella big ocean liner? We're the iceberg..."
-- ST Frontier Fleet, USS Calhoun, Stardate 2390.10.01
Harris: "As engineers, it's either hit your fellow crew or swear at the lady causing you trouble."
Su: "I'll be sure never to cause you trouble."
-- ST Frontier Fleet, USS Calhoun, Stardate 2390.10.01
"Deactivating flow control for diagnostic maintenance is not recommended while engines are in use."
(Alien ship's computer, after Maiek pressed the wrong button)
-- ST Frontier Fleet, USS Calhoun, Stardate 2390.10.01
Jameson: "I suppose my clothes kind of snuffed it?"
Bren: "Alas, the loss of a fine uniform."
-- ST Frontier Fleet, USS Calhoun, Stardate 2390.10.01
Crewman Day: "I wanted them off our backs, not part of the Colletive!"
-- ST Frontier Fleet, USS Calhoun, Stardate 2390.10.01
Jameson: "Erm... Sorry for the rather large hole in the ship."
-- ST Frontier Fleet, USS Calhoun, Stardate 2390.10.01
Jameson: "It'll take more than an exploding starship to keep me out of action for long."
-- ST Frontier Fleet, USS Calhoun, Stardate 2390.10.01
Crewman Day: "Well hurry up, I think they just powered weapons."
-- ST Frontier Fleet, USS Calhoun, Stardate 2390.10.01
Maiek: "Now if you will excuse me, I think I will go and stand behind a forcefield."
-- ST Frontier Fleet, USS Calhoun, Stardate 2390.10.01
Jameson: "Mam always said we'd go to heaven because the devil had seen enough of us in our lifetime... and I don't think that heaven is Starfleet flavoured, let alone Starfleet Sickbay flavoured."
-- ST Frontier Fleet, USS Calhoun, Stardate 2390.10.01
More Quotes #3
Maiek: "I never planned to meet up with the Borg on a Federation vessel."
-- ST Frontier Fleet, USS Calhoun, Stardate 2390.10.01
Crewman Day: "Just tell me I didn't fly us into Borg space, please."
-- ST Frontier Fleet, USS Calhoun, Stardate 2390.10.01
Holmes: "We stopped the program with a bomb."
-- ST Frontier Fleet, USS Calhoun, Stardate 2390.10.01
Maiek: "Flattery like that will get your memory purged."
-- ST Frontier Fleet, USS Calhoun, Stardate 2390.10.01
Bren: "Jolly good- No! I mean, er, argh!"
-- ST Frontier Fleet, USS Calhoun, Stardate 2390.10.01
Su: "I'm a pilot, not an engineer."
-- ST Frontier Fleet, USS Calhoun, Stardate 2390.10.01
Rachinov: "I will not be calling you Sweetie, I trust you do not mind?"
Sweetie: "It is not necessary for our relationship."
-- ST Frontier Fleet, USS Calhoun, Stardate 2390.10.01
Maiek: "As far as computers enjoying their function go, you aren't terribly convincing you know."
-- ST Frontier Fleet, USS Calhoun, Stardate 2390.10.01
Summers: "I gave him a message, but kind of turned him off."
-- ST Frontier Fleet, USS Calhoun, Stardate 2390.10.01
More Quotes 4
Summers: "It would be very nice not to have that fight with the safeties off."
-- ST Frontier Fleet, USS Calhoun, Stardate 2390.10.01
Su: "You'd deserve to be a Klingon, you know!"
-- ST Frontier Fleet, USS Calhoun, Stardate 2390.10.01
Bren: "Seems the poor lad just somehow... mutated."
-- ST Frontier Fleet, USS Calhoun, Stardate 2390.10.01
Jameson: "The specification says 'Chirp', not 'Bing'."
-- ST Frontier Fleet, USS Calhoun, Stardate 2390.10.01
Bren: "Do you fancy trotting down there, or do you have some important beeps to make with that tricorder of yours?"
-- ST Frontier Fleet, USS Calhoun, Stardate 2390.10.01
EMH: "Maybe I should deactivate myself now, before I say something silly..."
-- ST Frontier Fleet, USS Calhoun, Stardate 2390.10.01
Bren: "You see, people aren't going to want you just walking into their rooms fixing things, they'd find it a little disconcerting."
-- ST Frontier Fleet, USS Calhoun, Stardate 2390.10.01
Bren: "You think you think, therefore you possible may be."
-- ST Frontier Fleet, USS Calhoun, Stardate 2390.10.01
EMH: "'Real' people require life support when they're activated - I mean, when they're alive, er... all the time."
-- ST Frontier Fleet, USS Calhoun, Stardate 2390.10.01
More Quotes #5
Bren: "In a sense we're guilty of caring too much, strange eh?"
-- ST Frontier Fleet, USS Calhoun, Stardate 2390.10.01
Summers: "It's kind of funny, with all the problems we are having in our own back yard that we would want to jump into someone else's."
-- ST Frontier Fleet, USS Calhoun, Stardate 2390.10.01
Summers: "I ain't exactly a social butterfly myself. As you can see my flock of followers are on another ship."
-- ST Frontier Fleet, USS Calhoun, Stardate 2390.10.01
EMH: "Please state the nature of the - Oh, hello!"
-- ST Frontier Fleet, USS Calhoun, Stardate 2390.10.01
Bren: "I've got about three-hundred years worth of kitchen knowledge floating round in me. I know over two dozen ways alone just to make toast."
-- ST Frontier Fleet, USS Calhoun, Stardate 2390.10.01
Jameson: "I remember being twelve and counting stars from the apple tree. I remember being twenty five and and somewhere in the cold deep lonely dark between stars. Sometimes I don't quite know how one became the other."
-- ST Frontier Fleet, USS Calhoun, Stardate 2390.10.01
Harris: "She's a magnet for trouble and he's a leader of a cause he has no idea about."
-- ST Frontier Fleet, USS Calhoun, Stardate 2390.10.01
Harris: "Men are stubborn, slow and unrealistic and uncompromising. A starship canna be any of these."
-- ST Frontier Fleet, USS Calhoun, Stardate 2390.10.01
Su: "She? This station is also a she, then? Haven't you ever considered varying the genders a little?"
-- ST Frontier Fleet, USS Calhoun, Stardate 2390.10.01
Bren: "Oh yes, the new Base Commander is one Rovan Bren. He might look a little silly but I hear he's a decent chap once you get to know him."
-- ST Frontier Fleet, USS Calhoun, Stardate 2390.10.01
More Quotes 6
Summers: "Perhaps choking someone in front of the Captain could be a black mark in his book."
-- ST Frontier Fleet, USS Calhoun, Stardate 2390.10.01
Mulengri: "Middle of a dogfight is the best place for me, I wish I'd been invited sooner."
-- ST Frontier Fleet, USS Calhoun, Stardate 2390.10.02
Rachinov: "An interesting alarm call, Crewman, but maybe I should admit to preferring you helping me in the shower."
-- ST Frontier Fleet, USS Calhoun, Stardate 2390.10.02
Harris: "I understand Mr. Crewboy took Mr. Romulan on a joyride somewhere out there."
-- ST Frontier Fleet, USS Calhoun, Stardate 2390.10.02
Bren: "I appear to be covered in me."
-- ST Frontier Fleet, USS Calhoun, Stardate 2390.10.02
Jameson: "There are two positions in snowboarding. Either you're going really really fast. Or you're dead."
-- ST Frontier Fleet, USS Calhoun, Stardate 2390.10.02
Bren: "Believe it or not, when you get blown up and decompressed, you're excused from duty for a little while."
-- ST Frontier Fleet, USS Calhoun, Stardate 2390.10.02
Su: "Strike back.. take out their fangs..."
-- ST Frontier Fleet, USS Calhoun, Stardate 2390.11.16
Summers: "We will not be meeting, nor will we be doing anything afterwards. If your foul stench comes near me again I will personally rip your scrawny little throat from your shoulders."
-- ST Frontier Fleet, USS Calhoun, Stardate 2390.11.17
John Hart: ~ Marry!? I'm not ready for that yet, am I? I still have a lot of things I want to accomplish before I settle down. I mean, I always wanted my own ship and I also wanted to be STC and FO too. ~
-- ST Frontier Fleet, Uss Calhoun, Stardate 2390.12.08, 2134
Qar: ~ DAWN!! ~
Summers: ~Qar, tone down. We have a telepathic link, we're not
communicating through cans. ~
-- ST Frontier Fleet, USS Calhoun, Stardate 2390.12.09, 0720
More Quotes 7
Q- "Why is it you human always react with comtemp whenever we come to pay you a visit?"
Dawn-"Q, you came to me in the form of my dead first love."
Q-"Oh." (changes his appearance to that of Bothus and spreads his arms wide) "Is this better."
Dawn-"Ok, I'm out of here."
(Note Bothus being Dawn second lover who also is dead)
--ST Frontier Fleet, USS Calhoun, Stardate 2390.12.13
Art Tobius " Captain, there is no time to go into detail, but I'm going to have to kill Lt. Commander Summers!"
-- ST Frontier Fleet, USS Calhoun Stardate 2390.12.23
Couns Kroynian: "Pleasssse sssay Yesss if you understand me. Whatssss your name?"
Barac: ~ Obviously this barbarian didn't understand the complexities of civilized communication. ~
-- ST Frontier Fleet, USS Calhoun
The Other Jim: "Doctor Bren? I thought you were... dead..."
FO Bren: "Er...i guess i got better?"
-- ST Frontier Fleet, USS Calhoun
"Shadows of Time" Quotes
Consul Torlith: "2404 you say? Uhuh. I'm not usually in the habit of over sleeping."
- USS Calhoun, 2402.04.02
Bill Janssens : =^= Would it be possible that something strange is going on here? =^=
Harris: "No, not really. Just our annual get together with everybody from the Calhoun's past present and future."
- USS Calhoun, 2402.04.02
Consul Torlith: "Now is the winter of my discontent. To make dead Summers by this son of Cardassia."
- USS Calhoun, 2402.04.02
"The Network" - Quotes
ACSO MacPhelsmore: "Bars have been always the place to get information."
- USS Calhoun, 2391.04.06
"Changing Times" Quote
Harris: "Let's make this baby hum."
-- ST: Frontier Fleet, USS Calhoun, 2391.04.31
"What might Have Been" - Quotes
Jan MacInnis: "Good, lets find somewhere different to eat tonight. Anything you want. Well except Klingon, I'm not into having to chase my food around the table."
- - ST: Frontier Fleet, USS Calhoun, 2391.06.10
"Interlude" - Quotes
EMH (as Doctor Foster activates him for a medical emergency): "Doctor would you like a stimulating game of 3D chess...?"
- - ST: Frontier Fleet, USS Calhoun, 2391.07.10
"The Explorers' Fifteen" - Quotes
Leal: "I'm a doctor, Commander. Not a dolphin."
- - ST: Frontier Fleet, USS Calhoun, 2392.04.25
"Romulans!" - Quotes
EMH: "State the nature of your..."
Chris Su: "I would like to have a hamburger and some French fries."
EMH: "Well that would not be fully advisable. I can not begin to list the
problems with the burger let alone the fries. I can give you a complete
lecture on nutrition if you wish."
[...]
EMH: "I don't understand why you asked about the burger."
Chris Su: "I was being facetious, I find it very silly that you ask that every time you are activated. I mean you're standing in front of the bed facing the
patient and you're asking an engineer what the problem is, I mean if I was a doctor I would know and I wouldn't need you."
EMH: "Point taken."
- - ST: Frontier Fleet, USS Calhoun, 2394.11.03
New London
"Didn't go too goodly either." Dawn mumbled. "I'm begining to beleive that
in order to be an Admiral you need to have a full stock of riddles and
puzzles in your reparte to throw at people at any time."
Croatoan
2396.01.01
- "You're not going to blow up the ship while we are down there are you." Dawn joked
"Well..." Jake screwed his face up, "not intentionally, Captain."
- "It's first contact people, not a funeral." Dawn said with a smile.
